Chivalry, it’s not dead…

Yes ladies, you heard me right, it is not dead, it’s just under cover. Like Jack Bauer infiltrating a Columbian drug cartel, Chivalry has assumed a new identity and trying to fit in or die. Men blame their lack of chivalrous behaviour on women (as we do with most things) and to be honest we are a bit confused with what should be done and what should not be done. I believe that most men would like to open doors, help little old ladies cross the street and help neighbours with their groceries, but, how many times has this backfired on the average man? In today’s world of sexual innuendo it seems that every gesture is framed as a possible attempt to hit on the person on the receiving end of the gesture. Just recently, I saw two ladies moving a table down a flight of stairs. They seemed to be struggling a bit, so I asked (I’ve learned from experience that you just don’t rush in to help anymore!), “Would you like some help?”. To which the response was, “I don’t need a man to do anything!”. Now, it was clearly said as a joke but with undertones of determination. Like most things in life, men aren’t necessary to women, but we are nice to have . The statement really took me by surprise. It’s not that I was being macho, but more that I was genuinely willing to help, if it were two men doing the same job I would ask the same question. To be clear, there are jerks out there, men who have no regard for anyone in the rush of getting through their day. However, there are some diamonds in the rough.

So today ladies, take a step back, look around you and see the hints of days gone by where men still do the little knightly things that make us nice to have around……sometimes.

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Communication tip

Communication is essential in life, so my tip for today when sending a message is to think of it as a text message (but using proper grammar!). You only have a limited amount of characters to use, so use them wisely and reduce the fluff. This can be applied to both verbal and written messages.

This is the end of this post. :)

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JSON format and serializing ColdFusion query objects

Every so often there is a tiny problem that has you scratching your head until you RTFM. I love JSON, it’s totally awesome and the fact that you can not convert CF objects natively is even better! I ran into a small issue where I was using serializeJSON on a structure that contained a query object (don’t ask!). The problem was when the serialized string was deserialized using deserializeJSON the query was no longer a query, it was not a structure! It turns out that the serializeJSON function takes two parameters!

SerializeJSON(var[, serializeQueryByColumns])

The second optional parameter serializeQueryByColumns tells CF to handle queries in a special way. Now the trick is to remember to use the second parameter of the DeserializeJSON function which performs the reverse operation. The second parameter must be set to false for the query object to be recreated during deserialization.

Here are links to the serializeJSON and deserializeJSON in LiveDocs.

Posted in ColdFusion, Programming, Thinking | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Ready to start walking…

It’s 12 days into 2010 and I’ve finally decided to get this section started. The walking section will be a video blog on weight loss. Yes, it’s been done before but this is going to be my motivation to do more. I’ve been reading a lot about passion and motivation and what drives people to accomplish amazing goals and I’ve decided to do this. The two reasons are:

  1. I’m going to be a bit selfish and use this as a tool to help me get into shape
  2. I really would like to help people and I think this would hopefully be a way to give something to other people who are out there in the same position

So watch-this-space, sign up to be notified when new videos are posted. The first video should be up tomorrow and will give a better introduction to what it’s all going to be about.

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Saying goodbye

There is a saying that you can never really ever go home once you’ve left. This may or may not be true. When you consider that home is a tropical paradise of which people in tiny, cold, cubicles day dream, how can you think you can never go back? I left my home 8 years ago at the age of 23 with a wife and young daughter in tow, off to make something of myself in the land of opportunity. By most standards I’ve done pretty okay. By most standards, not my own. Being a foreigner in the big world is always a challenge. You constantly have to worry about visas and picking your family up and moving around. There comes a point where you get tired of jumping through hoops just so you can have a home. What is worse is trying to stake your claim on anything in your profession. It is very difficult when you are not a native national to a country, you don’t talk the same way, you have different views and you are almost always seen as an outsider stealing the job of a local. Many would not like to admit it but it is a sad fact. I have many friends who, after leaving Trinidad and Tobago, went to school and served in various roles abroad echoing the sentiments that they are tired and frustrated and just want to go home.

And so, one of my best friends is on his journey back to the land of the Steel Band, Limbo, Calypso and Soca. Today, you can keep in contact with people using all of the tools on the web. Video chats, emails, Twitter, blogs, Facebook which keeps you in contact but there is something about sitting in a pub, chatting over a pint that the Internet will never be able to replicate (well at least not in the next couple of years). The intimacy of a friend expressing his love for someone, or his frustration at work or the simple pleasure of having a laugh. I have no doubt we will still be in contact and still remain the best of friends but I will miss the times when he comes over to sample some of my wife’s curry or after visiting another friend we found ourselves at 5AM wandering around town trying to find something to eat.

His journey is one of discovery and a fresh start and even though I wish him the best and hope that everything he is about to experience is great, I will miss my friend.

Posted in Personal, Talking | Tagged | Leave a comment
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